Time to have a baby

I was thinking this morning, how great life is. I have a little girl who is about 22 months. She is really great! We have so much fun together every day. We have gotten to a point where it usually isn't a big deal to go to the store together or do errands together. She likes to help me out and that is the key to keeping her happy while we are in the store. She holds the bag for the produce or holds something and if she is really good I even let her help put things into the bag.

My house is clean. Every day I do a different chore and so it is clean, not just picked up, but actually clean and it stays relatively clean (this has never happened until probably the past 2 weeks.)

I feel good. I fit my clothes that I didn't fit even before I had her. My stretch marks are almost completely faded. She is sleeping at night. I can run a couple miles and it feels great or go work out for an hour and it feels really great.

So, you may ask (and honestly after making this list I may ask too) why would I trade all of that in? It has finally gotten a little bit easier to have her around. I have gotten back a good bit of life again, but deep inside of me I know I want something else a lot more.

I want to watch my daughter play with her siblings and I want to have family vacations, and maybe even have room in the back for kids quarreling over who gets to sit behind their dad (or whatever it happens to be about that time.) I want to get all teary eyed as they grow and change and develop and as I get to watch.

I know sometimes it really isn't very popular, having kids, and even having more than a couple is getting really odd in today's society. I really don't even know how many more we will get, but man I really do hope that more come to our home. I love it. I love being a mom. I love having to remind myself to be patient when I get frustrated. I love having to take time out to snuggle when it is time for bed. I love teaching my child to pray and seeing how sweet it is when she kneels to the ground. I love watching her play with her dad. I love how crazy my glass windows get with these cute little hand marks. I love when she sings with me in her little voice and tries to find whatever tune I am going to sing and she keeps up with it.

I don't know when or even if we will get to have more come, but I really hope it happens. My husband and I were talking about how it is really unexpected to feel more excited about the second. We were excited with our first, but both of us are so excited to try and have another child come. It is like we both know what it is like now, we know what to expect, and we can't wait!

Well, she just woke up, so that is my que.

(If you are reading this, please don't be judgmental of my thoughts. Just remember it is a good I am thinking and feeling, and it is a process. Not one I claim to be right or wrong in, just one that I am experiencing!)